"Such wonderful people these wood elves. They have a high tolerance for pain but very susceptible for my charms. I could stay here and study them further." suggested Lorelei.
"Everyone who's tortured half to death would be susceptible to pleasure." muttered Edwin.
"You clearly don't understand pleasure and pain my dear." said the succubus then bit into the wizard's left ear and whispered: "Pain can be pleasure."
"Thanks but no thanks." said the wizard and stood up from his chair while rubbing his ear. "You can stay here if you want in this city but we're going to pick up more troops then join the main armada and sail to Essblor."
"Essblor? That jungle city has nothing but smelly ogres and mosqitoes." complained Lorelei.
"Even so we need to take the city and recruit ogres. Unless you have a way to persuade these elves to join us?" said Zodd joining the conversation.
"I can do that." said Lorelei.
"Would they remain loyal after they climbed out of your bed?" asked Edwin.
"Maybe for a day or two. My charms have limits." admitted the succubus.
"Then we prep for departure. You can stay if you want." said Zodd.
"And leave you guys blind and deaf wide open for assassins? Nah. I'm coming with." said Lorelei.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 29 (May, Year 3)

"It's a pity this thing does not have sound." said Lorelei as they all stared at the divining pool showing the hundreds of ogres storming the elven city of Ormgryte.
"Burn want smash puny elves too." complained the ogre as they watched the elven defenders being crushed by the huge fists of his brethren. The daggers were barely visible in the hands of the ogres and served only as a tool to parry the swords of the enemies.
"Rolf could have waited for our arrival. He's taking all the fun." agreed Zodd.
"Well, I'm pretty sure we'll find some fun when we arrive. That city is huge. They can't destroy the whole thing in a month." noted Edwin.
"And the enemy is routed." said Zodd and turned to Edwin: "A month is a long time. I'm not so sure if anything will be left standing by the time we arrive. Can't you speed up this barge with your magic?"
"Not if we want to arrive in one piece. My studies were focused on dealing the most damage and not on aiding a ship in it's travels." replied the wizard.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 28 (April, Year 3)

Zodd looked through the expense reports with a frown. "Our income shrunk quite a bit last month." he noted.
"What did you expect? We were recruiting troops like crazy in the last few weeks. Ogres and minotaurs eat a lot." replied Lorelei.
"We'll recoup our expenses after we've taken that elven city. Building that road network in the underworld should also bring a few thousand extra silver each month." said Edwin.
"It's a drop in a bucket compared to the riches of those cities on the Great Plains our competitors have conquered." said Zodd.
"It can't be helped. If we can't compete by quality we should compete by quantity." suggested Lorelei.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 27 (March, Year 3)

"I hate horses." said Edwin frowning at the saddled brown mare in front of him.
"Would you prefer a camel?" asked Zodd and looked at their orc vanguards struggling with a couple of camels.
"No. I'd rather use a gate or lacking that a flying carpet. Sadly we don't know any nearby gates and only carpet we possess is needed elsewhere." replied Edwin.
"Did you pack everything?" asked Lorelei impatiently.
"Maps, herbs, weapons, food and booze. All accounted for." said Zodd.
"Then let's go." said Lorelei and mounted her black stallion.
Edwin looked back at the tower that has been their home for the last few months and sighed. "That galleon better be waiting for us when we arrive."

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 26 (February, Year 3)

Wandering Monsters (16) claim the following settlements:
Ormgryte
Banyc
Crawnkim
Radeng

These settlements are off limits to all races with good alignment.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 25 (January, Year 3)

"Three more months and we're out of here." said Edwin as soon as Lorelei entered the room.
The succubus looked suprised. "How did you kn..."
"It was written all over your face. You are bored and you want to get out of here." said Edwin with a chuckle.
"Right. And where exactly are we going in 3 more months?" asked Lorelei.
"I don't know yet. But I will get to a phase my studies when I will be able to manage for a few months without a tower. I'm open for suggestions about where to go next." replied Edwin.
"Right. I'll gather intel and present my ideas in a week." said Lorelei excitedly and rushed off towards the map room.
"Are you sure about this?" asked Zodd from Edwin.
"Yes. Recent events indicate that studying invisibility is a waste of time. We'd better focus on taking more cities as soon as possible." replied the wizard.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 23 (November, Year 2)

"Hurry up! It's about to start!" said Lorelei to Zodd her eyes fixed on the smooth surface of the divining pool.
"Here. I had Burrrn make some popcorn." replied Zodd handing over two bowls then he turned to Edwin: "Are you sure this thing will work?"
"Yes. The image might be fuzzy but we'll see the battle all right." replied Edwin.
"Here it goes. That's Rolf for sure." said Lorelei and they all watched as the tall viking came to focus. The human was leading a battalion of ogres and goblin crossbowmen as they charged at six dozen figures on horseback surrounding a goblin scout.
"Wait a minute. Where's the kraken? What are we watching?" asked Zodd.
"The anchor of the spell is on Rolf. He must have rushed to the aid of that scout." replied Edwin.
"Are those elves? You have keener eyes." asked Zodd from Lorelei.
"Yep. And they carry the Windmasters banner." replied the succubus.
"They are not very effective." noted Edwin as the carnage started.
"They don't have any weapons. They might be good riders but it's hard to trample ogres when the heads of your horses only reach as high as the waists of your opponents. Good. Rolf must have ordered the goblins to climb onto the back of the ogres. They can aim their crossbows pretty well from there and they are protected from the riders. We have a capable tactician." explained Zodd.
"Well, he has more than one talent." said Lorelei licking her lips.
"You bonded with him as well?" asked Edwin incredulously.
"We had a few nights together in the Ethaqi jungles after the merfolk battle. I make sure that all our tacticians are loyal and obedient. And satisfied." replied the succubus with a smirk.
"That went quick." said Edwin as the battle was already over.
"We had superior forces and a better tactician. The outcome was obvious." said Zodd.
"That's typical of Rolf. He never makes anything last longer than necessary." said Lorelei and rose: "I'll be in my chambers. Send for me when you see tentacles."

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 22 (October, Year 2)

"How long are we going to sit here idle?" asked Lorelei.
"We are not idle. I'm teaching you advanced tactics. Edwin is studying in the tower with his apprentices and we are waiting for the scouts to spot more monsters to hunt while the smiths work day and night to produce enough weapons to arm our troops." said Zodd.
"Exactly! We are stationary. We are waiting for things to happen instead making things happen. Where's the excitement and adventure in that?" complained Lorelei.
"Girl you need to learn how to relax and enjoy the quiet downtime between battles. There's more to life than carnage and combat." said Zodd.
"I know. But I've already seduced all the humans in camp. And you drunk all the wine and smoked all the weed we had and there aren't any mushrooms in the vicinity. I'm bored." complained Lorelei.
"Well, if you are bored you can help me to plan our next conquest." suggested Zodd and unrolled his maps.
"Great. What city are we taking next?" asked Lorelei excitedly and joined him at the planning table.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 21 (September, Year 2)

"This go here. This go here. This go here. Burn ready." said the ogre proudly.
"Very good. The shinbones are upside down but otherwise not that bad. Next corpse." instructed Edwin.
Burn frowned and said. "Healing difficult. Fire magic better."
"Well, it was you who wanted to learn healing. In order to do that you need to know how a bone structure looks like or your patient ends up like that poor kobold you tried to heal last month." said Edwin.
"Kobold lives. Burn heal ok." protested the ogre.
"You removed half his ribcage. His left lung collapsed. He's bedridden for life." complained Edwin.
"Rib broke. No good." said the ogre.
"True he had three broken ribs from that sword cut the guards dealt him but that's no reason to remove bones. All you had to do is dress the wound. The ribs would have mended on their own." said Edwin.
"Rib stuck out. Burn hands too big. Kobold too small." complained Burn.
"That's true. I tell you what. I'll assign you two kobolds whose job will be to do the surgery. All you have to do is wait until they finish then place your hand on the wound and use healing magic as we practiced." said Edwin.
"Good." said the ogre then asked: "No more corpse practice?"
"Not unless you want to learn necromancy." said Edwin with a wry smile.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 20 (August, Year 2)

"Is this the best those kobolds could build? It looks crooked. Are you sure that the stairway won't collapse under the weight of your apprentices weight?" asked Lorelei from Edwin as she inspected the hastily completed tower.
"It's solid enough. I'm just glad that finally I have a quiet place to study. You can't hear your own thoughts in the city." said Edwin with a smile.
"Yep. The kobolds are quite rowdy after our victory. They think that they are free to do whatever they want now that most of the guards are dead." said Lorelei with a smirk.
"The little idiots. I wonder how long they will last in the quarries and mines. We need a lot of raw materials for the roads and weapons." said Edwin.
"Who cares? There are thousands of them and they reproduce like crazy." said Lorelei.
"Boss. We ready. Teach." said Burrrn and adjusted the fancy two handed sword in its scabbard on his left hip.
"Do you really need that many weapons? Mace, maul and sword? You can kill more men with your fireballs than you will ever going to kill with those." said Edwin with a frown.
"Burrrn like weapons." said the ogre.
"I can see that. But three at once? I've seen you adjusting the scabbards and straps all day long. It's a distraction you don't need." said Edwin.
"Burrrn like weapons." repeated the ogre. "This one from dragon. This one from bog monster. This one from merfolk."
"I know. I remember where you got them. But you only have two hands. Lose one of them and strap the other two onto each side of your belt so they don't bump into each other." ordered Edwin.
The ogre scratched his hand then swung each weapon testing them and decided to lose the sword. He sheathed it then unstrapped the scabbard and gave it to Edwin with a frown. Edwin handed it to a kobold who almost collapsed under the weight of the two-handed sword but steadied himself and scurried away happily.
"Kobold too small for sword. Burrrn better keep it." suggested the ogre.
"All he has to do is show it to the peasants and collect taxes. We'll recruit some orcs later. They will know how to use them. Come, it's time for another lesson." said Edwin.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 19 (July, Year 2)

"Finally!" sighed Edwin as he glanced at the lights of the city of Banyc at the distance then he sat down next to a stalagtite and pulled off his comfortable pirate boots to massage his feet.
"It doesn't look that impressive." said Lorelei with dissappointment in her voice.
"What do you expect from kobolds?" asked Zodd and spat. "I'm surprised they have managed to build a city at all."
"What do you have against kobolds?" asked Edwin.
"Nothing. They are weak and pathetic creatures. We'll have an easy task taking that city." replied Zodd then left them to organize the troops.
"What's with him and kobolds?" asked Edwin from Lorelei.
"Long story. Zodd was summoned by a kobold warlock once long ago. The foolish creature somehow managed to get himself killed in the process of the ritual and Zodd spent weeks sitting in the middle of a warded summoning circle." explained Lorelei.
"How did he escape?" asked Edwin.
"He didn't. Some demon hunters located him and banished him back to the pits of hell. Don't bring up the subject in his presence. He's still mad about it after two centuries." said the succubus.
"I assume he's looking forward to our next battle then?" asked the wizard.
"Hell yeah. Just don't be surprised if he accidentally kills a few kobolds fighting on our side as well." said Lorelei.
"Well, we have over five hundred of them. A dozen or two won't make a difference." said Edwin with a shrug and pulled his boots back on.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 18 (June, Year 2)

"Bright. Strong. Burrrn like it." said the ogre and swung the mithril maul as a test. The goblins around him who already learned to keep some distance from the big ogre scattered immediately.
"There's another one here." said Zodd and pulled it from the charred remains of the bog thing. The other ogre took it from him with a grin. "Burn and Burrn are two. Shiny thing are two. Good." he said showing two fingers on each of his hands.
"It's cauled a maul." said Lorelei to the ogre then he turned to Edwin: "He can count to two and just used a two syllable word. You guys are making progress I see."
"Laugh all you want but they really learned a lot for their kind." replied the wizard then he changed the subject: "Two mihtril mauls and a bag of silver? I expected more from this old bog thing. We should go back to hunting merfolk I guess."
"Or pirates. While you were busy digging through the ashes of that thing a runner came from the southeast. A group of pirates landed not that far from here." said Lorelei.
"You think we have time for them before we descend through the shaft?" asked Edwin from Zodd.
"If we are quick enough." replied Zodd.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 17 (May, Year 2)

"How the hell did OUR bog thing get here? We're four months travel distance from the gate?" asked Lorelei as she disembarked from the longboat.
"Are you sure it's the same one?" asked Edwin.
"Yep. See that crocodile carcass stuck into the thing's left side? There aren't any swamps nearby. It's from the swamp of Uthrun for sure." replied the succubus.
"Small world huh? What are we going to do with it?" asked Edwin.
"We kill it." said Zodd and picked up his sword from under his seat of the longboat.
"Wait a minute! We have only a handful of crossbowmen and the three dozen men from the local militia to support us." warned Edwin.
"Come on wizard. We can do this. Show us what you and your ogre friends are really made of." said Zodd and started shouting orders to ready the troops for battle.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 16 (April, Year 2)

"Stupid priest." grumbled Lorelei and spat at the corpse at her feet.
"Well said." nodded Zodd then kicked the staff of the fallen foe towards Burn. "You want this?"
"Burn have mace. Burn like mace more." replied the ogre shaking his head and swinging his mace in his right hand.
"Suit yourself." said Zodd then he turned towards the succubus and asked: "Who were these people anyway?"
"They call themselves Joyful Interlopers. Whatever that means."
"Showin up on our territory with taxers makes no sense. What did they expect? We idly watch as they collect taxes from the populace while our men twiddle their thumbs?" said Edwin.
"Well, they had very little combat skills and no tactical sense at all. Typical religious fanatics if you ask me." said Zodd.
"What's next?" asked Lorelei.
"We'll order our men to keep an eye out and see if there are any more of these fools wandering around. Then we continue our journey. The second longboat is ready. We should be able to reach the shaft in a month." replied Edwin.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 15 (March, Year 2)

"Well, fuck me." said Edwin looking at all the spoils of the battle.
"Any time darling." commented Lorelei then realizing what the wizard was looking at even she turned silent.
"Shit are those all gems?" asked Zodd.
"Yep." replied Edwin then added. "I wonder if these merfolk had any idea what kind of riches they possessed. Shit, that's more than..."
"Hush." said Lorelei putting her delicate hand over Edwin's mouth. "Try to remember that we have some human followers now. Unlike our goblin and ogre friends they DO know how to count."
"You are right. We need to hide this stuff and smuggle it to the nearest city and sell it." said Edwin in a hushed voice.
"Make it three cities. We can't flood the market of a single city." said Zodd.
"All right. Let me handle this. You take care of the rest. And have the troops dig some graves. Those corpses are starting to stink already. They smell like rotten fish." suggested Lorelei.
"Nah, that's probably the fish cart over there. They had a lot of food stockpiled. Grain and livestock as well. We'll have no trouble feeding our troops for a while. Looks like we are eating some very fine steak tonight." said Zodd with a smile.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 14 (February, Year 2)

"All right, listen up! Form up according to battle groups as you have been trained!" roared Zodd as soon as he jumped to the shore.
The ragtag army of ogres, goblins, gnolls, hobgoblins and humans who gathered on the shore at their arrival slowly formed up in front of him as ordered. The lines were crooked and the rows had gaps in them but the different elements were clearly visible. 30 ogres formed the centre front while about a hundred goblins gathered on the right side. The left was covered by a few dozen humans and gnolls with a few hobgoblins among them. Zodd turned back to the ship and shouted: "Stingers! form up behind your brethren on the right!" he shouted at the sixteen goblins carrying crossbows and watched as the little folk quickly jumped to the shore and started running to obey his orders. "Not MY right! THEIR right!" roared Zodd in his inhumanly loud voice and the goblins hurried to correct their mistake. Zodd then turned to Edwin and the two ogre mages towering behind the wizard: "Burn and Burrrn, you support the left flank. Edwin, you and me form up the center."
"What about me?" asked Lorelei.
"You are our recon. See if you can spot our target and get back with PROPER info about their number and position. These merfolks are sneaky bastards. It took our scouts months to spot them." explained Zodd then added. "You are the only one I can send to both spot and count them."
"Fair enough." said Lorelei and turned to a small goblin hiding in the shade of the mast: "Come on Blip. I need someone stealthy and quick to relay messages."
"This might actually work." muttered Zodd as he watched Lorelei depart to their north while the goblin following her was already out of sight in the underbrush of the jungle.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 13 (January, Year 2)

"I told you we should not leave it to the ogres to measure their own weight." said Lorelei to Edwin and put two more longs onto the campfire.
"Who would have thought it's so easy to overburden that thing? And who would have thought that ogres are so damn heavy?" Edwin replied.
"Hindsight is 20-20. They have already pulled the ship to shore and they will replace the lost oars in no time. We'll be on our way in a few days." said Zodd.
"It's a pity those sandlings only had one horse. We could be on our way by land by now." complained Lorelei.
"I prefer ships over mounts. You can't do anything useful while riding a horse." said Edwin.
"Too bumpy for your wizard ass? You should try riding a giant spider then. 8 legs provide a smooth ride." suggested Lorelei.
"No thanks. Nothing short of a dragon would persuade me to get into a saddle." replied Edwin.
"You are no fun at all." said Lorelei then changed the subject. "Have you decided on a name for the ship?" she asked Edwin.
"As a matter of fact I have." replied Edwin.
"Yes? What is it?" asked Zodd.
"Come and see. The goblins should have finished painting it by now." said Edwin and led the other two to the shore.
"Ann Devour? Who's that?" asked Lorelei with a frown then she burst out laughing. "I get it! They were supposed to write Endeavour but they can't spell for shit am I right?"
"We really need to find some humans. Or any literate race." said Edwin with a sigh.
"I don't know. I kind of like their version of the name better." said Lorelei still laughing.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 12 (December, Year 1)

"Whether we succeed in our efforts or not this will be our biggest logistical accomplishment. Gathering a hundred souls and having them to walk for almost half a year is either our best move or the stupidest thing we've ever done." said Zodd and folded his map.
"If we get a safe distance from that kraken I say it's worth the effort." replied Edwin.
"I'm just glad we get to go by boat most of the way." said Lorelei.
"Let's hope that our ogre army doesn't get lost on the way." said Edwin.
"Boss Lady! Boss Lady!" squeeled a goblin runner.
"What is it Flipflop?" asked the succubus.
"Sandlings. Sandlings. This many." said the goblin drawing nine lines into the mud.
"Sandlings? This deep in the swamp? They strayed quite far from the desert." Lorelei said then turned to his companions: "What do you say to a last hunt before we depart?"

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 11 (November, Year 1)

"Yum-Yum. Croc good food." said Burn and bit into the burned remains of the crocodile he killed while the others were looting the rest of the crocodiles.
"How's your head?" asked Edwin from the ogre and pocketed the few silver coins he found.
"Good. Head no hurt no more. Month long rest good." replied the ogre.
"Perfect. So you two are ready for some more magic studies?"
"More ma-gic?" asked Burrrn and joined his cousin in the feast.
"Yes. I figure you guys would be able to grasp some hands on magic such as weather lore and wind magic. Summon tornadoes perhaps." said Edwin.
"Wind ma-gic? Burn knows small wind ma-gic." Burrrn said and farted then laughed. "See?"
"Very funny. When I'm done with you guys you will be able summon tornadoes and lift entire armies into the air and smash them with a wave of your hand. It will take a lot of time and effort. Are you interested?"
"Smash army? Burrrn like that. Burrrn want learn wind ma-gic." said the ogre.
"How about you?" asked Edwin from Burn.
"Burn want to learn wind ma-gic too. But want to know ma-gic stop head hurt first." replied the other ogre.
"It's called healing. I can teach you some basic healing spells." nodded Edwin and pointed at the remains of the other crocodiles. "I think we have enough material for an anatomy lesson right here."

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 10 (October, Year 1)

"Ahh, charcoal. Perfect. We'll barbecue some ribs tonight." said Zodd after the wildfire died off running out of fuel after it completely consumed the dry part of the swamp.
"Burrrn, my friend, care to tell me why you burned down all these trees? Were you practicing your fire magic? again" asked Edwin.
"No. Burrrn help build boat." said the ogre.
"With fire?" asked Edwin "Please explain."
"Small folk said they have no axe. They need fire to shape boat. Burrrn think big fire big boat. But fire too big. Sorry." explained the ogre sheepishly.
"My friend, you can't build boats by throwing fireballs at trees. The fire needs to be applied after the trees are cut down to shape canoes out of tree trunks or to bend and harden the planks the boat will be made out of." said Edwin.
"Uh-huh." said the ogre scratching his head then nodded and headed back to camp.
"And now he's on his way to try his luck with the wood we stockpiled up at the drydock." said Edwin to himself and ran after the ogre to stop him once again cursing the day he decided to recruit ogres as his apprentices.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 9 (September, Year 1)

"This is where we will build our permanent camp." Zodd pointed at the map with a wide grin.
"But it will be ages to get there. How far is it? Like 5 months of travel?" objected Lorelei.
"That's just a logistical issue we'll need to overcome." replied Zodd and they both looked at Edwin.
"What? You expect me to conjure up a couple magic carpets or a floating island? Can't do it. We'll need to get there a more conventional way. I guess we'll need to have a longboat built." Edwin replied.
"Two longboats. We need to get across this land bridge over here." said Lorelei examining the map then added: "But at least I won't go hungry while we travel. Those lands are inhabited by humans."
"It's a logistical nightmare. We'll be lucky to get there by February. If we decide to move there that is." said Edwin.
"It's better than staying here with the kraken lurking at our doorstep." suggested Zodd and stood up from the table.
"Where are you going?" asked Lorelei.
"To organise a lumbering crew. We have two options: We arm our goblins with crossbows and turn that kraken into a nice pincushion or we build a ships and sail away as soon as possible. Whichever plan we choose we'll need wood. Lots of wood." replied Zodd.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 8 (August, Year 1)

"Burn burn burn!" roared the ogre and lit the bush on fire.
"Very good." said Edwin and the ogre's face lit up.
"Burn thank boss. Burn proud. Burn no good at fight. Now Burn feel strong." roared Burn.
"Good. But don't go pick fights with your comrades. I didn't teach you fire so you could kill other ogres. There will be plenty to burn soon enough. I promise. Where's your cousin?"
"Night rain kill fire. Burn go make new fire. Goblin bring food. Burn help cook." replied Burn.
"I see. Making himself useful. At least he's practicing. But we really need to find another name to call you." Edwin said.
"What wrong with Burn?" asked the ogre.
"I need to be able to tell the two of you apart. Can't call both of you Burn. How about Spark? Flame? Scorch?" asked Edwin.
"No. Burn no like. Flame small. Spark, Scorch no burn. Burn is best." replied the ogre.
"Fine. Then how about Burrrn? With a long and srong R?" sighed Edwin.
"Good. Burrrn like it." said Burrrn.
"Very well. Burn and Burrrn it is. So now that the two of you can hurl fireballs what should I teach you next? Spirit or pattern?" asked Edwin.
"Spear it? Burrrn no good with spear. Burrrn like fire. Pattin? What pattin be?" replied the ogre.
"Never mind. Let's keep practicing fire. Try to burn that tree down next." sighed Edwin and went back to his own studies.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 7 (July, Year 1)

"That guy was delicious." said Lorelei after she re-joined the others in campfire.
"Welcome back." said Zodd with a smile. "Took you long enough. You've been away for a week." he added.
"Wait a minute. You're saying that poor soul lasted this long?" asked Edwin.
"Yep. He expired this morning." the succubus replied with a smile.
"After the pounding he received from our ogres and the fireball I hit him with I thought he was dead." said Edwin shaking his head.
"Oh, he had some life left in him. That Motsognir leader was a fighter. He struggled until the very end." Lorelei said.
"You drained him dry didn't you?" Edwin asked with dread.
"Yes. In every aspect of the world." replied Lorelei licking her lips. "Now that I'm back to normal what did I miss?
"The bog thing crawled away to the south. We are safe for now." Zodd replied.
"Curious. I didn't know that that thing could climb rocks." Lorelei said.
"Neither did we. Nor did we expect to see a kraken in those mountains." said Edwin.
"A kraken? In the mountains?" asked Lorelei.
"Well, at the cliff facing the ocean." explained Zodd.
"Calamari and firewood all in one place. Everything seems ready for a nice cookout. That is, if you and your apprentices are ready to start the barbecue." said Lorelei looking at Edwin.
"Now wait a minute. I said we will be ready to take out the bog thing but together with the kraken they are way too strong." objected Edwin.
"Party pooper. Well, if you guys don't need me at the moment I'll be off again." said Lorelei and stood up from the fire.
"Where are you going?" asked Zodd and Edwin together.
"One of our goblin lookouts spotted a lone human at the same place we encountered the Motsognir leader. I figure if there's no barbecue party I'll have some dessert. See you guys in a day or two."

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 6 (June, Year 1)

"We need to do something with that bog monster. It's a good thing Lorelei noticed it. How do you like your steak?" said Zodd and walked to the cooking fire to check the meat.
"I'm already working on the issue. I've accepted two apprentices who show some affinity to fire magic. With their help we'll be able to burn that bog in a few months." Replied Edwin.
"Well done." Said Lorelei.
"It's not a big deal. Granted these Ogres have no affinity to learning letters but they have a photographic memory. With the right incentive..." the wizard started explaining but the succubus interrupted him.
"Umm.. I ment the steak. I like it well done. Almost black." said Lorelei.
"I thought you fed on sexual desire, extasy and the like." said Edwin.
"If I relied on only those I'd starve in these swamps." replied Lorelei sourly then stood up, moved behind Edwin and whispered in his ears: "You don't know what you are missing by refusing my offer."
"But I know what I'd be missing if I accepted it. A great deal of my life force and my soul to boot." replied Edwin.
"I promise I'd give back everything I took with interest when we've conquered our first human or elven settlement and I had plenty of unguarded minds to haunt and souls to harvest. And you'd have a wonderful time until then. I promise." purred Lorelei.
"No dice." Replied Edwin.
"Steak's ready. We're eating crocodile today." said Zodd and joined the other two. Then he turned towards Edwin and asked: "So you're training ogres to be fire mages?"
"Yes. Burn and Burn are quick studies...."
"Wait a minute. Burn and Burn?" asked Zodd.
"They used to call themselves Crush and Squash but changed their names when I told them that soon they will be able to use fire magic." replied Edwin.
"Ogres and their monosyllabic names. said Lorelei shaking her head then asked: But why ogres? Why not goblins? They seem smarter."
"True, but they are too quick, clumsy and timid. A single mishap and a goblin student ends up dead. If an ogre makes a mistake chances are he'll survive the ordeal." Edwin explained.
"So when do you think they will be ready for action?" asked Zodd.
"I need at least another month. Three months would be better but I need at least 30 days as a minimum" said Edwin.
"Good. I need at least as much to come up with a viable strategy and we need more troops to keep you three alive while you burn that thing to ashes." said Zodd.
"Let's hope it leaves us alone until then." noted Lorelei.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 5 (May, Year 1)

"Nicely planned ambush. They never seen us coming" Said Edwin and nodded to Zodd in approval.
"Nothing but a bunch of half-starved lizard men. They had no tactical sense at all. Camping in the open like that. Incompetent fools." replied Zodd with a wave of his hand.
"They had nothing on them." Lorelei joined in the conversation after examining the bodies and signaled to the ogres that they can take away the corpses.
"Good practice though." said Edwin flexing his fingers and smiled.
"Someone is in a good mood" observed Lorelei.
"Well, it's good to be young again." Edwin replied then asked: "You seem moody today. What's wrong?"
"What's wrong? Where should I start? We are in the middle of nowhere. There's no-one important to charm and dominate. We have no means to take the hobgoblin city and this swamp stinks." the Lorelei explained.
"She's hungry. She can't feed much on the dreams of dumb ogres and goblins. And I guess you being a skilled wizard guard your dreams with your mental discipline." Zodd said with amusement then winced as Lorelei kicked him.
"Edwin dear, I don't suppose you could share your bedroll with me tonight?" Lorelei asked with the sweetest smile and the coldest eyes the wizard had ever seen.
"Not a chance. If you've spent as many decades in a failing body as I have you'd understand that I value my new found youth more than anything. You won't be able to seduce me - my dear." Edwin replied with a wry smile.
"Challenge accepted." whispered Lorelei into the wizard's ears then started walking back towards their own camp.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 4 (April, Year 1)

"Whatcha reading?" Lorelei asked Edwin.
"One of our scouts sent a report with that big bird over there." Edwin replied with a frown and pointed at a vulture-like bird perching at a big tree.
"I thought that none of the ogres we recruited could read or write even if their lives depended on it."
"Of course they can't. But they can draw. I'm trying to figure out what kind of creatures live in the settlement he found to the southwest. Wanna help?"
"Sure. Let me see... Not a minotaur. They are subterraneus. Orc maybe? Hey Bash, can you come here and take a look at this drawing?" She asked one of the ogres at the next campfire.
The big ogre looked confused then approached them. "Boss lady want me? I'm Smash. Bash go get wood for fire." he said.
"Whatever. Can you tell us what creature did our scout draw on this piece of boar skin?" Lorelei asked.
"That be Dash. Good scout. Run fast. Draw nice." The ogre said after examining the drawing.
"Yeah, yeah. Nice drawing. What kind of creature is it?" asked Edwin impatiently.
"Hobgoblin. Many many. Live in hut many day dat way. No. Dat way." Smash replied pointing to the south then corrected himself and pointed westwards.
"You knew there was a hobgoblin settlement within a month's distance and you never mentioned it during the whole month we've been here?" Edwin asked raising his voice.
"We forget. Sorry. Please no punish no fire." The ogre said in alarm then seeing that Edwin did not intend to hurl a fireball at him like during their first encounter a month earlier he continued: "Tasty hobgoblin but fight good. They wield nasties."
"Nasties?" Lorelei asked.
"Long like us bone knife but shiny. Cut deep." the ogre explained and felt at an old scar on his left thigh.
"Swords. Right. How big is that settlement? How many guards did Dash report?" asked Edwin.
Smash looked at the drawing again and pointed at what looked like a tuft of grass on the picture. "That many. Dash smart scout. See how many. Draw how many." He said with a smile.
"Thanks a lot Smash. You can go now." said Edwin with a sigh then turned to Lorelei. "Writing and reading is not an issue but counting is. Either we get smarter scouts or I'll need to use farsight on that settlement myself."

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 3 (March, Year 1)

"Have you ever heard of the word subtlety? How about Inconspicous? Blending in?" Edwin asked as they stepped through the gate.
"What's wrong with our appearance?" Zodd countered with a frown.
"A 7 feet barbarian brute and a lady with exquisite beauty in revealing clothing is not what I'd describe as subtle." the wizard countered.
"Well, I won't want to look like an old crone. I work my charms through seduction. I'm a succubus after all." replied Lorelei.
"And I won't look like a wimp. It's against my very nature." said Zodd.
"Never mind. Let's see where we ended up at." said Edwin as the gateway dissipated behind them.
They were in a swamp that seemed endless to the north and northwest. Open water reflected the rising sun to the northeast and a mountain ridge blocked their view to the south.
"Not the best place to end up at." Lorelei complained.
"There were 31 gateways to choose from. And my magic was not strong enough for a targeted gate jump anyway. Remember, I should have died long ago from old age before you rejuvenated me. It could be worse. To look on the bright side we're less likely to bump into paladins or high elven priestesses here in these wastelands. They could detect your kind from miles and dispatch an army to send your asses back to the Abyss." Edwin countered.
"True. I wonder what kind of followers we could find in these swamps." Zodd said.
"Humans. Wood elves. Lizardmen. Orcs. Goblins." the wizard replied.
"Well that's definitely not a goblin." said Lorelei pointing at a 9 foot creature in the distance.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 2 (February, Year 1)

The two demons looked at the collapsed figure of the ancient wizard at their feet and smiled.
"The old mand did it. Never thought he could get us free from the abyss." Zodd said then continued. "A deal is a deal Lorelei. Give him some life force."
"Very well. I guess a hundred years should be enough for him." said the succubus and sighed. Then she kneeled down and kissed the wizard on the mouth. "Rise and shine Edwin Odesseiron." She said watching the impossibly old body transform to a century younger version of itself then helped the rejuvenated man to his feet. "Where are we anyway?" she asked after looking around for the first time.
"Nexus. A small inbetween plane separating various words." Said the wizard feeling his face and stretching his muscles with satisfaction then continued "Now that our deal is done I guess I'll be going. You can find your own way from here."
"Not so fast human." Zodd said and placed his huge hands on the shoulders of the wizard.
"The deal was to take us to a place where mortals live and frolick happily. A place we can gather followers, dominate, subdue, rule." the succubus breathed hotly in Edwin's ears.
"Very well. But you'll need to change your appearance. Those horns and wings of yours will make the locals run for their lives." The wizard said.
"What do you suggest?" Zodd asked.
"Human form. Average build. Subtle. Something that you'd never notice in a crowd. Take your time. I need an hour to get the gate spell ready." Edwin replied.

     – Wandering Monsters, Turn 1 (January, Year 1)